Chapter 23 – What to Do, In Front of My Roommate I Performed a Split

This was Wei Ru Song’s first kiss.

Actually Wei Ru Song thought that his first kiss with Xiao Nian would be a bit more romantic, something like under a glorious fireworks display, the lights of the fireworks lighting up their faces, exploding fireworks slowly descending just above them, in that moment Xiao Nian’s face would definitely look very nice; or maybe at the Bridge of Sighs where they did not manage to see due to the chaos from Xiao Nian’s parents, they would really stay together forever just like the legends; if not it could also be under the warm yellow streetlights, as they shivered in the cold while their lips and breaths met warmly.

–But this isn’t bad as well, at least we’ve kissed. Although it was not initiated by Wei Ru Song, he would just have to remember to get it back next time.

Someone started clapping, the crowd followed, the applause was as loud as thunder, the skill of the crowd in creating liveliness was amazing, there were more and more people watching, someone also took out their phones to capture the moment.

“Don’t!”

​Wei Ru Song covered his face, he still was not prepared to be famous in this manner. Luckily Xiao Nian was clever, he pulled the hood of Wei Ru Song’s coat over his head, and told the stunned host.

“Your attitude toward your customers is very upsetting, but as it’s Valentine’s Day today, I don’t want to let my lover hear anything bad, I’ll come down next time to settle this privately.”

The host was speechless, the crowd muttering and pointing, his face flushed, he turned around wanting to hide in the restaurant, but was stopped by a call from Xiao Nian.

“What’s this, no need to apologise before leaving?”

Chen Xuan Xuan was also instigating the crowd.

“Exactly, from just now till now he never meant to admit his fault, this is too much, is he looking down on them?”

Under pressure the host apologised to Wei Ru Song and Xiao Nian, and also offered them a free couple’s table, Xiao Nian rejected it, coolly departing with Wei Ru Song. While leaving Wei Ru Song mouthed a “Thanks” to Chen Xuan Xuan, Chen Xuan Xuan also mouthed a “Keep Fighting” back to Wei Ru Song.

Wei Ru Song off-handedly remembered his conversation with Chen Xuan Xuan on the rooftop, his advice at that time might have sounded very assholish, but Wei Ru Song sincerely wished the best for Chen Xuan Xuan, despite having flaws, she was still a very good woman, maybe if Xiao Nian did not appear, they might have had a different ending to their story.

There were not so many “maybes” in the world, as long as there was a happy ending, no one would regret it.

“This is infuriating,” Even after walking a distance, Wei Ru Song was still boiling in anger, he could not help but start scolding. “Fuck, I want to report him, let him be fired!”

Xiao Nian saw Wei Ru Song this angry, he contemplated for a moment and pulled his sleeve.

“Senior let me tell you something, you might be happier after hearing it.”

“Say it.”

“That restaurant is owned by my father’s company,” Xiao Nian’s words were shocking. “To fire him is something very easy.”

“Huh?!” Wei Ru Song choked, what was with this “overbearing president saying he loves me” situation found in third-rate romance novels? – I’m feeling a little dizzy, help, help, someone come support Us… “Why didn’t you just say it then? How often can we be in an idol drama-like situation, I would still be able to share your main lead’s spotlight!”

Wei Ru Song was still considered pretty silly, very easy to coax, looking at his face filled with envy, all Xiao Nian wanted to do was to tease him.

“I didn’t want to use my identity to pressure him, but if you want we can return and tell him now?”

“No need, no need,” Wei Ru Song rubbed his belly, “I’m starving, let’s get something to eat first.”

The streets were packed on Valentine’s Day, couples were everywhere, because of the situation just now, the area they were in was overcrowded, the old Wei Ru Song would have been pissed, as a noble single how could he mix around with these nauseating couples?! Now… Wei Ru Song could only quickly join the crowd, facing the fact that he was one of them.

Finally Wei Ru Song gave up, their first dining location after confirming their relationship was actually at Fei Ji’s BBQ store, Xiao Nian looked pretty pleased about it, but it was uncertain if he was giving face to Wei Ru Song or he really did not mind eating BBQ.

Wei Ru Song was really starving, he finished 40 sticks of kebabs in less than two minutes, Xiao Nian saw it and could only find it funny and feel sorry for him as well.

“Are you really so hungry?”

“Of course, I only ate till 70% full during lunch, leaving space for a buffet, who knew they wouldn’t let us enter, so infuriating!”

To be honest Wei Ru Song had took the incident to heart, but he was very careful to not show it in front of Xiao Nian.

He had resisted being rumoured as a couple with Xiao Nian from the start, was because he did not like people to gossip about him, saying that he was gay, a homosexual, calling him a pervert. Wei Ru Song grew up in a traditional family, he had never considered about sexuality freedom, many people were like this, they would say that they did not support but were also not prejudiced against homosexuals, an opinion like this was already discriminatory, falling in love was supposed to be something natural, just like how people needed to eat, drink and sleep, why did people need to support or reject it?

Only after spending more time with Xiao Nian did he start changing his views, at first towards Xiao Nian, Wei Ru Song was very defensive, despite knowing Xiao Nian was also a victim of the rumours, he still avoided him as though Xiao Nian would “spread the gay” to him. Whereas Xiao Nian was magnanimous and poised, influenced by him Wei Ru Song also confidently puffed his chest out and continued being a macho straight man. Actually the two of them were pretty compatible, Xiao Nian was a young master who would never do housework, while Wei Ru Song was a diligent and hardworking old woman, suddenly from mutual interest it would turn to love then sparks would fly, the situation was way beyond what Wei Ru Song could ever imagine.

If only love had knocked on the door before entering, turning gay without any preparation was truly– Too provoking! I’m still a child let go of me!

Done with the meal, they disinterestedly visited the mall, there were many events happening there, tonight was destined to be the night of consumption, Wei Ru Song and Xiao Nian however were unaffected, strolling one round they found nothing interesting. They walked to the outdoor square, there happened to be a few makeup brands promoting, normally Wei Ru Song definitely could not even bother to look at them, but when he heard that one of the prizes was a life-sized cutout of Jolin Tsai, his eyes lit up.

“Let’s go Junior, I believe as brothers working together, we will win the prize!”

“Our 3rd prize, it’s our spokesperson Jolin Tsai’s life-sized cutout, 2nd prize, it’s this aromatherapy light, our first prize!” The host exultantly lifted a box of lipsticks, “It’s a whole set of our brand new lipsticks! They’re all the season’s latest colours! The pretty lady who wins this prize will have to apply the lipstick and give her boyfriend a kiss! Everybody can we do this?”

“Can–“

Wei Ru Song was determined, he enthusiastically signed up, and kept instructing Xiao Nian, they did not hope for the first prize, only the third, if he were to win that life-size cutout he would hug it to sleep at night! Xiao Nian’s expression was a little odd, “Why did I never know that you like Jolin Tsai?”

Wei Ru Song poutingly pushed him, “I still can dance along to <Dancer>, despite being at this age, my splits are perfectly straight.”

“Hmm, I also feel that Senior’s body is very flexible.” Xiao Nian thoughtfully stroked his chin.

Maybe Jolin Tsai’s life-size cutout was too attractive, there was another gay couple in the group of ten couples, everyone applauded and cheered them on.

The rules of the game were simple, one would explain and the other would guess, whoever who guessed the most would win. Wei Ru Song believed that having played video games together with Xiao Nian for so long they had great teamwork, that they could basically communicate without words.

In the end looking at the first phrase Wei Ru Song had a headache, how to explain “Muacks”?

“One syllable,” Wei Ru Song pursed his lips and kissed the air madly, while making sounds that were a little disgusting. “Po po po po…”

“…” After 2 seconds Xiao Nian answered. “Kissing?”

“One syllable!”

“Kiss?”

“No, I’ve expressed this to you before, I’ve done it to you before!”

“Muacks?”

“Correct!” Wei Ru Song wanted to jump over and kiss Xiao Nian. “Next, one word.”

Wei Ru Song pointed at his crotch, Xiao Nian was silent, he wanted to say dick, but felt that being in public the answer could not be so obscene.

“It describes a person!”

“Prick.”

“Right right right!” Wei Ru Song blew Xiao Nian a flying kiss. “Next, this… what is this? One word,” Wei Ru Song for some inexplicable reason his mind turned dirty, he called out to Xiao Nian with a high-pitched voice, “Master Master, do you want to eat rice or eat me first?”

“Maid.”

“Correct! Correct!”

Having guessed 3 in a row correctly, Wei Ru Song was exhilarated, he wanted to lift Xiao Nian up for hugs and kisses- You’re really my darling! The next phrase was “forever alone”, Wei Ru Song was unable to describe it, so he passed on it, next one was “I love you”, the whole crowd cheered, but Wei Ru Song was silent, he hesitated for a moment before passing it, but Xiao Nian managed to give the answer.

“I love you.”

The audience was stunned, even Wei Ru Song was stunned.

“How did you know?!”

“Because I feel that you really want to be the first to say this, but now I’m saying it first.”

The next phrase was <Dancer>, this Wei Ru Song was very good at, Wei Ru Song immediately started dancing provocatively, Xiao Nian’s eyes could not leave the sight.

“Seduction?”

“Jolin Tsai’s song! The one I told you just now!” Wei Ru Song did a split. “You still complimented me saying my body is flexible!”

“<Dancer>!”

Xiao Nian’s mind too started turning dirty, the next time he would definitely get Wei Ru Song to dance for him.

“Right right right! Damn Junior I love you so much!”

“Me too.”

When time was up they had a total score of 5, not too high nor low. Wei Ru Song was full of expectations, everything comes to those who wait, Wei Ru Song and Xiao Nian with a marvellous performance had won the– first prize.

—What the fuck the script wasn’t supposed to be like that! As two guys why the fuck would we want the lipsticks?! The host could still smilingly ask them to take a group photo, Xiao Nian from start till end had a zen expression on his face, whereas for Wei Ru Song he could not even smile.

Most importantly, the third prize, went to the other gay couple… Wei Ru Song decided to try and discuss with them.

“Two big brothers, why don’t I swap these lipsticks for your cutout? I see your lip colour is very similar to this lipstick.”

“Sorry,” The delicately made-up boy rejected. “I signed up because of the life-sized cutout too.”

Damn, this was still not the end, the winner of the first prize still had to apply the lipstick and kiss the boyfriend, what was this situation! God are you really playing with me!