Chapter 55.1 – Loving and Protecting

Rong Xi’s soft sniffles were extremely heartbreaking. Although he enjoyed hearing her cries during sex, he didn’t like to hear or see her cry during other times. Crying in his arms, he felt a little useless.

After the marriage rites had been completed, Zhuang Emperor had sent someone to summon him to Ganyuan Hall. His father was a worrywart to begin with when it came to him, and he even asked him in detail about the golden eagle’s attack.

Mu Huai had personally stepped onto the battle field before.

On the battle field, blood would splatter like rain as swords cut without mercy. Mu Huai had experienced such cruelty and stepped over countless enemy corpses. He had avoided countless ambushes and traps so naturally, he didn’t think much of a dumb bird that wanted to attack him.

However, he didn’t expect that when he returned to the Eastern Palace tonight, his woman would react the same way as his father. Extremely worried and even a little traumatized by the events.

Rong Xi’s stomach had become round and big already, but her figure still looked quite petite overall. It was uncomfortable for her to carry around this big stomach of hers, but she still insisted on leaning against him.

The complicated and extravagant wedding today had already depleted her of her energy. Once nighttime came, this pregnant lately began to lose control of her emotions again, disregarding the wellbeing of her body.

Thinking of this, Mu Huai’s brows sank and he was about to admonish her. However, after a beat he realized that nowadays, this woman couldn’t take even the slightest bit of scolding. If he tried to teach her a lesson, she would definitely cry even harder.

Mu Huai could only reign himself to carefully pull the crying female in his arms away and wipe away her tears. Trying his best to make his tone more gentle, he persuaded, “What are you crying for? Aren’t I safe and sound? It’s not like a bird can do anything to me, you’re looking down on your husband’s abilities.”

Rong Xi stared at him with her watery eyes then whispered, “Husband wouldn’t understand this kind of feeling…when this concubine sat in the carriage today, there was an instant where I suddenly felt that I would lose you…this kind of feeling, it was so frightening…this concubine doesn’t dare to recall it.”

Finished, this teary-eyed beauty once again wanted to dive into his arms.

Mu Huai looked downwards and in a suppressed voice, “You’re still heavily pregnant, don’t moved around recklessly.”

Although Rong Xi let go of Mu Huai when she heard this, she pouted in dissatisfaction and looked away, secretly wiping away her tears. Originally, Mu Huai was not a very attentive person and he wouldn’t understand this type of heart-stopping feeling. Just take it as if she was being fussy and let her slowly acclimate her emotions.

Looking at her fragile back, for a moment Mu Huai didn’t know how to coax her.

A while ago, he heard the imperial physician say that at times, pregnant women would lose control of their emotions and throw a little tantrum here and there. The imperial physician had heard about his foul temper and was afraid that his cruelty would extend towards his pregnant wife and hurt the cild.

Although that imperial physician had developed a bit of friction with Rong Xi due to the Di clan’s matters, he still possessed a doctor’s soul and ethics, wholeheartedly thinking of the wellbeing of his patient. The imperial physician had also especially instructed Mu Huai to not scold Rong Xi because of her mood swings.

Seeing her sobbing so sorrowfully, Mu Huai could only let out a helpless sigh.

Going closer to her, his firm arm circled around her waist. Despite her difficult pregnancy, she had never held a grudge against him and had endured the discomforts of pregnancy very well during this time period.

Mu Huai was a very aggressive and domineering type of person. He usually would never lower himself to coax a woman, however, he was very clear on the frightening feeling that Rong Xi mentioned. In his past life, he had been embroiled in this feeling for over a decade.

His thoughts were the same as hers. Rong Xi was afraid to imagine her life after his death. He was afraid to recall her appearance and the happenings between them.

Especially the days when Rong Xi had just passed away.

Mu Huai recalled what happened in his past life–

At that time, he would return to the Eastern Palace alone every day. Seeing the empty and desolate inner hall without a trace of her petite silhouette, and unable to her her warm and soft voice calling his name, he felt his heart ache. If he recalled her image, his heart would ache even more. Every night, his dreams weren’t of his cruel actions towards her. Instead, they were of him holding her as he lay in that cold casket with her.

Awoken by his nightmares, Mu Huai wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore. In the middle of the night, he would go to the study and read some random novels so that he could forget about that cruel woman. Why would he long for such a woman, what was so good about her?

He was the crown prince of Great Qi, the future monarch. What kind of woman wouldn’t he be able to have, was he really going to long for this woman ’til the day he died?

Every day Mu Huuai would force himself to forget Rong Xi, but he would always seem to hallucinate and see her standing next to him, calling out to him in that soft and delicate voice of hers.

Each and every call of ‘Your Highness’ almost made his heart shatter into pieces.

When the hallucinations disappeared, he felt lost and dispirited.

Why did he not treat her better at that time; recalling his interactions with Rong Xi, she would either be cautiously working or she would clamp her hands over her lips, her eyes glazed over in pleasure yet not daring to express it out loud.

He was truly terrible to her. But when he wanted to treat her better, she was no longer present.

Just like that, a few years went by and Mu Huai couldn’t help but admit that his very being was being engulfed by a dead woman.

The second year after he ascended the throne, seeing how other than the Empress Dowager and a few dowager consorts, his inner harem was devoid of his own consorts and he also did not want to marry the Di family’s daughter, many senior officials advised him to hold a selection. Even if he did not choose one to become the Empress, he still had to choose a few noble young ladies as his consorts so as to continue the royal lineage.

Mu Huai accepted the suggestions of his officials and also wanted to choose a few consorts through the selection so that he could forget abut that woman.

He was the emperor, he could pick any woman in Great Qi so why couldn’t he let go of Rong Xi?

But even though he had agreed to his subjects’ requests, Mu Huai was not very enthusiastic about the selection and after a few days, he had thrown this matter to the back of his mind.

That day after court, he went to Ganyuan Hall as usual. Not allowing himself to rest for even a moment, every second and every minute of his waking hours were spent on organizing government affairs. Just as he was focusing on amending policies, one of his advisors, Cheng Song, had carefully walked into the hall. Because he was considered a close aide, he did not need the eunuchs to announce his arrival.

Moreover, Cheng Song lived his life as if he was Mu Huai’s eunuch anyways.

Mu Huai raised his eyes and saw the bowing Cheng Song and asked in a displeased tone, “What is it?”

Cheng Song cautiously answered, “…Your Majesty, today is the day of your selection. This subject had forgotten to remind you last night…may Your Majesty forgive me.”

When Mu Huai heard this, he slowly set down the ink brush in his hand, then replied indifferently, “I understand. Zhen will go now to choose the concubines.”

Straightening his sleeves, the strings of jade on his crown coldly clicked back and forth.

There was a crowd of blue-blooded beauties waiting for him to pick from.

He should be happy, isn’t this the dream and envy of countless men?

But Mu Huai thought of that delicate woman once again.

He frowned and coldly told off the woman in his heart, Don’t bother Zhen anymore, Zhen will have another woman today. Sooner or later, there will be a day when you’re forgotten.

Cheng Song saw Mu Huai’s countenance had suddenly turned dark and couldn’t help but ask, “…Your Majesty…are you alright?”

Mu Huai continued to frown and answered, “It’s nothing. Tell Zhen, which family’s females are here.”

Cheng Song respectfully introduced the noble young ladies to Mu Huai, talking about their age, appearance, and temperament and talents. Cheng Song said a lot, but Mu Huai did not seem to hear much.

In a heavy voice, he said, “Zhen can’t remember the names of so many women. Let’s decide after Zhen sees them later.”

Cheng Song assented.

When Mu Huai sat in Zhuoying Hall, because he did not marry Di Shiyin, Empress Dowager Di used the excuse of being ill to not leave Weiyang Palace. Instead, Dowager Consort De personally came to Zhuoying Hall out of concern for Mu Huai’s marriage and help him choose a consort.

But when those well-dressed young aristocratic ladies with their meticulous makeup entered the hall, Mu Huai’s countenance turned even uglier.

All these women couldn’t compare to the natural beauty of that woman.

None of their voices were as pleasant and moving as hers either.

Even if there was a noble young lady that was intelligent and talented in the four arts, Mu Huai felt that their temperaments were all displeasing to the eye.