Chapter 105 – YanMingXiu’s Confession
YanMingXiu’s voice trembled, “Ge, you must have been very curious about what JiKong Master said to me. The answer is now in front of you, because ZhouXiang is alive.”
YanMingSu looked at ZhouXiang in shock. Although he knew his younger brother is obsessed with this person (younger ZhouXiang), he also recognized that it must be because of (older) ZhouXiang. He had said that YanMingXiu’s affections are fickle, but in fact, he knew that YanMingXiu has never freed himself from ZhouXiang’s binds all along. But regardless, he would never believe such a bizarre thing even if he was beaten to death.
This person is obviously not (older) ZhouXiang. He had seen pictures of (older) ZhouXiang… No, the main point is that ZhouXiang is indeed dead!
Then what is this thing in front of him that his brother is saying is ‘still alive’?
“You… you… tell me clearly, what are you talking about?”
Seeing that these words can’t be taken back, ZhouXiang had no other choice but to lower his head. All right then! Now that the secret he had intended to bring to the grave has been revealed to those that essentially should know, the only thing left is a deep sense of powerlessness.
YanMingXiu glanced at ZhouXiang and muttered hoarsely, “Ge, you may not believe me, but you will believe in your master, right? ZhouXiang really did have an accident. That dead body is indeed ZhouXiang. But he had awakened in someone else’s body, in a person who has the same name and had an accident the same time as him. The person you’re now looking at is him.”
YanMingSu took a step back and took a breadth of cold air. He looked at ZhouXiang in disbelief. His voice trembling, “How could you be so sure? There are many coincidences in the world. What if he is lying to you, what if…..” YanMingSu didn’t say anything further. He knew that it is impossible. If this is true, then that means he is real. Although YanMingXiu has been devastating confused by love, he is not stupid enough to be fooled by something this ridiculous to such an extent. Moreover, he vaguely remembered that his master had said some ambiguous words at the time. Seeing ZhouXiang’s odd expression, and now thinking back, those words might have meant something. It might have been connected to this entire matter.
YanMingSu flopped down on the sofa. This is already outrageous for any normal person to hear such things, let alone seeing it with his own eyes.
Of course, it had crossed his mind that YanMingXiu could be lying to him because he has once rashly shouted at this disappointing brother of his that if this ZhouXiang do come back alive, he will wish them a long-lived harmonious union. So YanMingXiu could make up such a lie to trick him to get passed his barrier.
But what about his master? Should he ask his own master about it? His master will definitely not lie to him.
YanMingSu wanted to call and ask, but in his heart, he had already believed.
He didn’t think that YanMingXiu will lie to him about this kind of thing. In fact, although he had told this ZhouXiang that YanMingXiu would one day forget about him just like he had forgotten that ZhouXiang to get him to retreat, but in the past three years, he had seen how much YanMingXiu had suffered with his own eyes. He knew that YanMingXiu had never forgotten ZhouXiang. Even if he is looking for another person; it is still because of ZhouXiang.
YanMingXiu can’t be deceived and won’t use something like this to lie to him. This person is really that (older) ZhouXiang.
When YanMingSu thought of such, he simply can’t lift his head to look up at ZhouXiang. It’s all too strange.
YanMingXiu voiced hoarsely, “Ge, will you help me? You’ve said that if ZhouXiang is really alive, you will approve of us.”
YanMingSu’s face is particularly unsightly, “Fuck, how would I know that he would really come back alive.”
ZhouXiang resolutely muttered, “This matter, you can’t tell anyone outside of this house, especially my mom. If you use this to threaten me and she finds out, I will not let you off at any costs.”
YanMingSu coldly snorted, “You watch too many TV dramas.” He quickly regained his calmness, “I need to carefully think about this. It’s too hard for me to digest this news at the moment. You guys go ahead and talk. Don’t take too long, I will wait for you guys downstairs.”
YanMingSu opened the door and walked out.
As soon as the door is closed, YanMingXiu pushed ZhouXiang to the wall and vigorously covered his lips with his lips.
The two nice and warm lips melded, full of the YanMingXiu’s familiar taste. ZhouXiang opened his mouth, letting the agile tongue invade his mouth, sweeping every wet corner of his oral cavity.
YanMingXiu seemed to have exerted all his energy with this intense kiss, as if wanting to swallow him whole.
YanMingXiu did what he had wanted to do these days. He kissed and caressed ZhouXiang, wanting to use physical intimate contact to prove that this person belongs to him.
No one can take him away.
ZhouXiang gripped his shoulder and slowly pushed him away, “Okay, I didn’t come about this.”
YanMingXiu clasped ZhouXiang’s chin. Seeing ZhouXiang’s pale face, he has a very bad feeling in his heart, “What happened? My brother made things hard for you?”
ZhouXiang turned his face and shook his head. He started to have problem breathing. He clearly had made a decision but couldn’t say it.
“Xiang Ge, what’s really going on? You don’t have to worry about my parents. They will eventually give in. Believe me. I will make it so that you can openly be with me without any reservation.”
ZhouXiang pointed at the tray of food, “Eat something, your mother made it for you.”
“Not eating.”
ZhouXiang furrowed his brows, “How long have you not eaten?”
“I don’t know, don’t worry. I have hidden some food, won’t starve to death. My mom is soft-hearted, she will persuade my dad.”
ZhouXiang pulled him to sit down. He couldn’t help himself from gently touching YanMingXiu’s emaciated face.
YanMingXiu squinted his eyes at him, “Xiang Ge, are you feeling pained for me?”
“Eat first.” ZhouXiang picked up the bowl of porridge, “Eat.”
YanMingXiu furrowed his brows and look at it. Finally, with ZhouXiang’s insistence, he ate the entire bowl of porridge.
ZhouXiang’s eyes didn’t blink, as he silently watched until YanMingXiu finished eating.
It’s obviously that YanMingXiu had been starving for a few days. Even though he tried to suppress himself, he still ate hastily. After he finished eating, he wiped his mouth with a napkin and looked at ZhouXiang with embarrassment. Although he had lost a lot of weight, his flirtatious expression still startled ZhouXiang.
YanMingXiu took ZhouXiang’s hand and smiled softly, “Xiang Ge, I’ve missed you so much. You must have called me right? My phone and computer has been confiscated.”
ZhouXiang nodded, “I also went to JiangYuan.”
“JiangYuan wouldn’t have dared to say anything. Did you contact my brother or did my brother contact you?”
“He contacted me.”
“What did he say to you?”
“You should be able to guess.”
“Well, actually my brother is more understanding than my parents. He will definitely help us. Xiang Ge, don’t worry. My dad is stubborn but my mom and brother will be able to convince him. In the end, he will definitely give in. Wait till next year, I’ll take you back to my home for the New Years.”
YanMingXiu grinned. His brimming smile is so wide that it almost overflowed. He seemed to have seen the outcome he wanted to see.
ZhouXiang’s lips twitched with his eyes lowered, not speaking.
“Xiang Ge?” Not getting the response he expected, YanMingXiu suddenly got a little anxious, “Xiang Ge, I’ve already gotten to this step, could it be that you still don’t believe in me? I can no longer go back.”
ZhouXiang voiced hoarsely, “Someone came to look for ChenYing.”
YanMingXiu is startled.
“Our matter, she knows. She asked me to return the money and condo to you. I came to find you today mainly for this matter…”
“No!” YanMingXiu shouted angrily, “What are you trying to say?”
ZhouXiang looked up with this eyes void, “MingXiu, I don’t know in your eyes whether or not you feel that I’m incomprehensible. Why would I care so much for a woman who is not my real mother? But I really want to treat her as my real mother. You can’t understand my lack of maternal love for the last twenty plus years. What it means to me? That day, someone from your family came and said a few words to her. Afterward, she can’t eat and can’t sleep well for several days. If you continue to be like this, I don’t know what your family will do to protect you. But no matter what it is, it’s not something I can afford to take on.”
“I will protect you and protect her, I won’t let…”
“MingXiu,” ZhouXiang interrupted him, “You can’t even get out of this house right now.”
Pain rose up in YanMingXiu eyes.
ZhouXiang felt that his heart had been pulled out, his lips are only automatically opening and closing saying the things that he had already prepared to say, “Let’s just move on, okay? I don’t hate you, all the things from the past written off with a stroke. Actually, the two of us are really not fated at all. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have been tangled for two lifetimes and still not have a good ending. Right from the start, we are not from the same world. If you had told me earlier that you are from the Yan family, I would never have dared to get involved with you. If we keep on persisting like this, we’ll both end up suffering. Let’s just end it here and move on with our lives.”
YanMingXiu stared at ZhouXiang with bloodshot eyes. He didn’t say anything but tightly clenched his lips, so hard that he could taste blood on his teeth.
None of this is how he had imagined it to be, completely different. Why is it that he had fought so hard to get to where he is today, but ZhouXiang still could not open his heart to him? He had done so much. Could it be that it didn’t matter at all to ZhouXiang? He had put his mind and all his efforts to make ZhouXiang believe in his love. He didn’t think that ZhouXiang couldn’t see it, but why… why do they need to end it here? Why? The thing that he, YanMingXiu wants, there is no such thing as “end it here”!
ZhouXiang does not know whether doing this is right or wrong. But he felt that it would be good for everyone. YanMingXiu made him waver but he should persist with his original decision. He should not be entranced. The person he is now must be more rational compared to the person he was a few months ago.
ZhouXiang’s heart had never felt so confused. He could no longer make the determination himself. Rather than say he made a decision, might as well say that he is evading in making a decision. But in YanMingXiu eyes, this is merely him “maintaining his original decision.” With all he had done in the last several months, still nothing has changed. YanMingXiu couldn’t accept these words, couldn’t accept the decision ZhouXiang brought. At a time when he is trying desperately to fight for their future, ZhouXiang actually refused to follow him. This is such big irony.
ZhouXiang looked at YanMingXiu, seeing his bloodshot eyes and distorted expression, he didn’t need YanMingXiu to open his mouth, he couldn’t say anything further. He grabbed his head, having a splitting headache.
YanMingXiu didn’t get overly agitated. Instead, he is surprisingly calm. He asked ZhouXiang, “Xiang Ge, are you serious?”
ZhouXiang didn’t move. He just nodded.
YanMingXiu’s eyes are blood shot with no emotions visible from his frozen expression, “I haven’t eaten for four to five days. Only my brother secretly gave me some bread. I’m not crazy to be doing this. I’m merely making a bet that my dad will give in. He will definitely give in. After all, I’m his son. I’ve thought that the hardest part would soon past, but didn’t think that the most difficult problem is still with you.”
ZhouXiang’s body trembled.
“I’ll tell you why I like WangYuDong. At that time, I was only sixteen. I’ve only just realized that I don’t like women. Instead, I have feelings for men. I was very scared but at the same time very excited. I finally knew why I couldn’t be like any other guys in being excited with holding girls’ hands. My age is right at a time when one is especially curious about love. I’m no exception so I started to pay attention to men. One day after school, I walked passed a movie theater, the big screen outside was broadcasting the trailer of WangYuDong’s very first movie. I’m sure that you have a deeper impression with that than me, because you were his stuntman.”
ZhouXiang paused and slowly raised his head.
YanMingXiu looked at him, his eyes void, “The trailer clip broadcasted on the screen repeatedly played the most classic scene in the movie… the part of him looking back after falling into the water. I was immediately mesmerized. I’ve never followed any stars but I felt that this back is so breathtaking. It fulfilled and satiated all my sexual fantasies.”
ZhouXiang opened his mouth and looked at him incredulously.
YanMingXiu continued, “So because of that, I started to be interested in him. Later, I left to go abroad. That country is very liberal. At one point, I indulged myself for a while. In fact, I rarely thought of him during this time. What I didn’t expect was that he would one day become my sister’s boyfriend. Do you understand that when I realize how close this piece of cake is to me, yet I can’t reach out for it? This piece of cake became especially delicious because it is the taste from all my imagination.”
As YanMingXiu continued to talk, tears from the corner of his eyes flowed down his face.
“When I met you, I wasn’t even 21 years old. I had no idea about love or what it is. I only firmly believed in one thing and always felt that it was right. I feel that I like WangYuDong so I should continue to like him. And so… I ended up ignoring you. I made a lot of mistakes, but I also paid a huge price. This huge price is something that I don’t ever want to think about in my entire life. What is most ironic is that it was because of this back that I fell for WangYuDong all those years ago. But this back was actually not his.”
Unconsciously, ZhouXiang’s eyes blurred. His eyes felt piercing pains as hot tears fell down his cheeks.
YanMingXiu choked with sobs, “It was actually not his… but yours. Xiang Ge. I have always liked you. But I didn’t realize it until it was too late. Everything that I’ve done wrong, I’ve received punishment. Xiang Ge, can I really not be forgiven?”
ZhouXiang opened his mouth but couldn’t speak. His tears flowed into his mouth; it is bitter beyond his imagination. The pain he felt is as if his heart is being pulled out, so painful that it overwhelmed him.
Who is the one actually messing with them? Who determined their fate?
Who is it!
End of the Chapter