Chapter 57 – Feeling Desperate

ZhouXiang made an arrangement with the doctor to have his kidney tested for compatibility the next time he come. This he did secretly behind ChenYing’s back. Even if his kidney is a match, the first issue is that he has no money for the surgery and second is that he’s afraid ChenYing would rather die than to agree to accept his kidney.

But no matter what, he has to give it a try. At least there’s more hope to save her.

Although ZhouXiang felt a little fearful on the possibility of having a kidney removed, he had no reason to back down. This body was not his to start with, but belonged to this youngster named ZhouXiang. He was just a dying person fortunate enough to have his soul hosted in this body to continue on living his life. This youngster is ChenYing’s son. On this body that hosted his soul, every strand of hair, skin and even this life came from ChenYing. He is the closest relative to ChenYing. He cannot evade nor can he be selfish.

After the two of them returned home, the atmosphere in the small apartment is like a dark cloud pressing down on them; it is extremely heavy. ZhouXiang went into the kitchen and quickly made two bowls of hot noodles.

His cooking skills had always been good, but after rebirth, these trivial things have always been taken care of by ChenYing. He was never allowed to do housework. This stubborn woman has always put her utmost effort into doing what a mother should do for ZhouXiang.

ZhouXiang often thought that if his own biological mother was alive, she would probably be like this too.

ZhouXiang coaxed her for a long time before she finally ate half a bowl of noodles.

ZhouXiang, “Mom, you’ll have to do dialysis treatment twice a week from now on. You can’t miss even one.”

ChenYing shook her head painfully.

The dialysis treatment today took nearly five hours. During treatment, every minute and every second was torment, especially if one has to live like this twice a week for maybe more than ten years, anyone would feel hopeless. Not being able to do anything or go anywhere, adding on having to expend immense effort and expense. Living like this……ChenYing would have rather that she had cancer so she could just die early and not burden her son.

ZhouXiang could almost guess what was on her mind from seeing her expression. This made him panic endlessly. He still has to work so it’s not possible for him to go with ChenYing every time. If he doesn’t go, he’s afraid that ChenYing would certainly not go. Pondering over and over, he decided to find a caretaker. Although that is an additional expense, the caretaker can care for ChenYing and take her to the hospital. This is a must-pay expense. Beside this, he has no other ways.

He thought of the auntie who took ChenYing to the hospital with him last time. The auntie was also doing monthly training with ChenYing and had mentioned that she also wanted to be a caretaker. She seemed very enthusiastic, strong and healthy so she should be suitable for this role. ZhouXiang immediately decided to call this caretaker tomorrow.

But if he hired a caretaker, this apartment would be too small. It would be best to change to a bigger place. He can’t have them all squeeze in one small room right?

ZhouXiang became instantly terrified and distressed. The more he thought, the more this is becoming outrageous. Where is he going to get so much money? If he really hired someone to take care of ChenYing now, it would have already exceeded his limit. The money he earned during this time could only support them for two to three months, any longer……

After two to three months, he would have no money to treat ChenYing’s illness. Even food and lodging would become a problem. At that time, what should he do? What should he do? What should he do?

ZhouXiang’s head is about to explode.

At this moment, his cell phone rang. ZhouXiang looked at it and saw that it was actually from YanMingXiu.

He had been a mess today, so matters with YanMingXiu and his condo were already thrown to the back of his mind. Looking at the time now, YanMingXiu would likely have already brought the criminal investigator to the condo. When people are going through difficulties, it’s very easy to think pessimistically. In addition, in this moment, an ominous premonition continued to rise in ZhouXiang’s heart. He really wanted to cuss.. to see how much more God wanted to mess with him.

Without even thinking, he immediately hung up the phone. Right now, he really didn’t have the energy to deal with YanMingXiu.

After comforting ChenYing to sleep, ZhouXiang sat on the shabby sofa in the living room and smoked one cigarette after another.

Racking his brains, he still couldn’t think of any ways to get a lot of money in a short amount of time, unless he wins the lottery, unless the money fell from the sky, otherwise…

Asking CaiWei is absolutely impossible. He couldn’t trouble CaiWei. But besides him, how many rich people does he know that can lend him money?

LanXiRong? Can’t… they are not close to that degree. His current identity is not close with LanXiRong. If he tells LanXiRong his true identity, LanXiRong might help him but he will owe him for life. He can’t imagine what will happen in the future.

President Wang? Maybe he can try. President Wang might be willing to help him with a couple ten thousands of yuan, but that will only solve his urgent need.

There is an option…. and that is to first ask CaiWei to borrow a few ten thousands. This should not be too big of a problem. Then after, ask President Wang to borrow another few ten thousands, which would total ¥100,000. At least this can support them till the end of the year. As for the rest of the money, who else? Who else can help him? Who else is rich and doesn’t care about money…

YanMingXiu?

YanMingXiu’s shadow suddenly appeared in ZhouXiang’s mind.

He is greatly alarmed.

Why did he think of YanMingXiu!

However, this is indeed a way. If he tells YanMingXiu who he really is, at least… at least he could get back his condo!

Although his condo was old and small, it was given to his father by a state-owned enterprise. The location is the best in the second ring. With such great location, selling it for two million is not a problem at all.

If the condo is sold, he can…

Selling the condo……ZhouXiang’s heart tightened fiercely.

It was the last asset his parents left him, the place he had lived for 30 years and the only place that holds his and his parents’ memories. He once vowed to never sell his condo his entire life. Even if he was too poor and have no food to eat, at least there is still a place for him to live. How could he sell this home!

Weighing this home left by his parents with ChenYing on a scale, which side is heavier (important)? ZhouXiang gripped his hair and could not find an answer.

If he doesn’t reveal his true identity, then he could not get back the condo. How can he watch and let ChenYing die? But if he got the condo back?… He fell into a deep contradiction.

His cell phone once again rang in the dark. ZhouXiang was afraid that it would awaken ChenYing; it had already taken her a long time to fall asleep, so he quickly picked up. The call was from CaiWei.

He took the call and went into the kitchen, closing the door and lightly whispered, “Wei Ge.”

“Is everything done?” CaiWei’s voice was a bit heavy.

ZhouXiang “hmm” a sound. Being trapped in such an endless desperate dilemma, he really wanted to hug and cry with CaiWei.

“How… how did it go?”

ZhouXiang’s voice trembled, “It’s uremia.”

CaiWei sighed heavily and didn’t say anything for a long time.

ZhouXiang faintly muttered, “I’m going to take another day off. Right now I’m really….”

CaiWei sighed, “You don’t have to come this week. Just stay home and be with your mother. Your mother… her life is too hard.”

ZhouXiang hoarsely responded, “Yea, she is……”

CaiWei was silent for a long while, “Ah Xiang, Wei Ge’s ability is really limited. I can give you ¥50,000.”

ZhouXiang chocked up emotionally, “Wei Ge, I can’t pay you back……”

“I don’t intend for you to pay it back unless you get rich later on. Uremia is an illness that needs a lot of money. I know that this money can’t solve the bigger issue. I’ll ask President Wang. President Wang can help you a little more.”

ZhouXiang honestly couldn’t refuse anything. He really needed the money now so he can only respond with, “Wei Ge, thank you.”

CaiWei is also working for someone else. For him to loosen his wallet and be so generous to a completely unrelated person whom he had only met for less than half a year, ZhouXiang had no idea how to thank him. From the time he opened his eyes till now, CaiWei had been helping and taking care of him. If there are any positives from getting a new life, it is being able to meet CaiWei again.

After hanging up the phone, ZhouXiang stayed a long time in the kitchen. His legs began to feel sore but he felt that such a small space gave him a sense of security.

At this moment, the phone rang again. It was Assistant Jiang calling. ZhouXiang didn’t want to offend him so he took the call. He didn’t expect YanMingXiu’s gloomy voice to sound through the other line, “You deliberately not pick up my phone?”

ZhouXiang’s head buzzed. He subconsciously responded, “No… Didn’t see it.”

“Then you see it now?”

“……Yea……is something the matter?” ZhouXiang’s tone was low, sounding weak and dispirited.

“What happened to you? Still not sober?”

ZhouXiang really hoped that everything that is happening now is just illusion from the alcohol, but unfortunately it is not.

He forcefully smiled, “(I’m) Sober. Why is President Yan looking for me?”

“I want you to come to my place right now.”

“Why?”

“No particular reason. I want to see you.” In YanMingXiu’s eyes, ZhouXiang is still an unknown newbie who certainly wouldn’t dare to offend him.

ZhouXiang’s voice trembled, “President Yan, I’m extremely not well today. I’m not going to go out. How about another day?”

“Where are you? I’ll have Xiao Jiang pick you up.”

ZhouXiang’s thoughts were in chaos. Every sentence that YanMingXiu said made him impatient. He responded irritably, “I don’t know. I don’t have time to see you. I don’t have time. I don’t have the energy. YanMingXiu. Don’t fucking torment me!” After he said that, he hung up the phone.

At this time, he didn’t care whether or not he said anything wrong nor offended YanMingXiu. He felt that his heart and lungs are going to explode. When he talked to YanMingXiu, there seemed to be a sense of awareness constantly reminding him that this was the person who forced him into desperation with no choice but to join the documentary filming group. Otherwise he would not have died. He would still be living naturally and freely with his true identity as ZhouXiang… not having to experience all this ……all this that made him feel immense pain.

It is him!

ZhouXiang didn’t want to talk to him; didn’t want to see him; didn’t want to touch him. He hoped that all the things related to YanMingXiu would completely disappear in this world so that he would never remember them.

If YanMingXiu liked him at the beginning, everything will be different, and all this sorrow wouldn’t have happened.

He never hated YanMingXiu as much as he did in this moment.

End of the Chapter