Chapter 402: Chapter 376: The Fake Aunt

It was a dark, windy night in Junyun Garden Area. A tall man with a pitch-black face blended in with the darkness around him.

“Youngest, going shopping?”

An enthusiastic uncle who was out for a walk greeted Yu Minglang. Even the Pekingese on the leash seemed to sense the hostility radiating from Yu Minglang’s oncoming presence, hiding behind its master and leaving only a trembling little bottom.

Yu Minglang had a black plastic bag in his hand, and the anger radiated so intensely that even the dog could sense it.

“Yeah.” Normally, he would chat with these familiar neighbors and elders for a bit, but now he didn’t stop his pace.

“This kid, why so in a hurry?” The uncle shook his head and watched Yu Minglang hurry away.

Yu Minglang didn’t want to be in such a rush, but Xiao Mei, who was in the bathroom, might need him.

He knocked on the bathroom door when he got home, and a small white hand quickly reached out from inside, seizing the black plastic bag from his hand before slamming the door shut.

Her frantic actions and deeply embarrassed feelings.

Xiao Qian felt that her period must be a fake period, always showing up at the most important times.

Yu Xiaoqiang was about to succeed, but then her period came…

Now that was really awkward!

She didn’t know why she was so unlucky, being patted by him last time and showing up at such an important moment this time. She was extremely embarrassed, and Yu Xiaoqiang’s energetic nosebleed might flow back and spray out of his mouth as resentful, old blood.

Who could endure such a situation at such an important time?

Poor luxurious rhinestone matching red lingerie, not even seen by Yu Xiaoqiang once, was thrown into the trash can, whining in self-pity. Was it really her fault?

It was as if she had died before even having a chance to act. Xiao Qian looked at the box in despair, noticing a line of small, inconspicuous text at the bottom: middle-aged and elderly women’s loose boxer shorts…

He didn’t have the guts to examine the item closely at the supermarket downstairs, so he bought Xiao Qian a replacement pair of fat and baggy boxers for middle-aged women, in stark contrast to the carefully prepared red lingerie she had chosen for herself.

Clutching the box of baggy boxers, one thought screamed in Xiao Qian’s mind: I am a moron!

After his experience buying sanitary napkins last time, he knew to pick the expensive ones this time.

As Xiao Qian was cleaning herself up, she couldn’t help but imagine his state of mind while buying these items in public.

A man buying sanitary pads with kindness and compassion in a military residential area—this kind of story could warm hearts and make its way into emotional story sessions. But who wanted this kind of heartwarming story?!

Xiao Qian wished she could slip out through the drainpipe and not see his awkward expression at this moment.

Yu Minglang’s expression was now very ferocious. Seizing the opportunity while Xiao Qian was not around, he grabbed the pillow and unleashed a flurry of combination punches on the bed, making it creak loudly.

If he had known this would happen, he wouldn’t have wasted time with steak, romance, and strolling!

Instead, he should have just had some quick buns or snacks, dragged her home after, and pinned her down on the bed for some lovemaking before her period arrived. That would’ve been so much better!

Now he finally understood how right the concept his father had instilled in him was!

Chinese people shouldn’t blindly worship foreigners and mimic their romantic ways, ruining their own sex lives in the process!

Cutting steak took so much time, and having that time to eat buns would have been so much better—meaty and filling, no need for veggies. One hand holding a bun while the other undressed Qian Bao, wouldn’t that have been perfect?!

Fully utilizing every second, his post-dinner exercise shouldn’t have been a stroll, but a two-person activity. That would have done the trick, right?!

Right now, Yu Minglang was determined that when he had a child, he would educate them well. Really, they shouldn’t learn from foreigners. Wasting time would never lead to a good outcome!

It took Xiao Qian a full ten minutes of mental preparation before she could finally walk out of the bathroom nonchalantly. Meeting Yu Minglang’s gaze, they exchanged silent looks.

“Forget everything that happened today, and don’t ever mention it again!” Xiao Qian decided to bury her head in the sand.

“Okay, actually, we just went through a parallel universe where you weren’t you, and I wasn’t me. We were Schrodinger’s Maple Forest by Night.”

“Maple Forest by Night, never mentioning it again!”

Boss Qian decided to hypnotize herself and seal away these events, pretending they never happened.

“Let’s go.” Xiao Qian walked out, needing to find something to distract herself from the awkward events that had just transpired.

Yu Minglang, upon hearing this, quickly grabbed her hand. “Where are we going?”

What the hell? She wouldn’t let him park and have sex, and now she wanted to go home?

Not allowed to eat meat, nor even hold her? Could he not just cuddle her for one night?

Seeing his dissatisfied expression, Xiao Qian explained.

“We’re going to see a movie, and then we’ll come back.”

Yu Minglang felt a bit more balanced then,

Xiao Qian whispered again, “But when we come back, you need to calm down your emotions. We need to keep things separate and not engage in a bloody battle…”

Crash! Yu Minglang hit the shoe cabinet.

Blood…what the hell?! He must have encountered a fake Qian Bao. His little beauty was a cold goddess; how could she say such things?

Well, even a goddess could crumble her image when faced with a period during a near embrace.

How they had come in hand in hand was how the would leave. Excited when they entered, dejected when they left. But good things come to those who wait, and life is full of twists and turns. Xiao Qian boiled up several bowls of soul-consoling chicken soup and forced it down her throat.

Yu Minglang, the whole time, had a black face, a fire raging in his heart that he could not extinguish.

Sitting in the movie theater, watching a mindless horror movie, they both became increasingly frustrated with the color red, though it had nothing to do with the film. It was purely due to resentment over their recent experiences.

The movie told the story of a woman in red who was killed and turned into a vengeful ghost, exacting revenge on those who wronged her. The screen’s reflection cast red light on Xiao Qian’s red down jacket, making her internal voice saying “I am an idiot” even more clear.

She failed at playing the romantic game, and now, all that was left was confusion! She vowed never to wear a red dress again. Never!

Yu Minglang also hated her red down jacket. At first, he thought it was great, but now he wondered if the color had summoned her relative to “protect” Qian Bao. He had to vent!

All that preparation for a big moment, which came to nothing. How frustrating it was!

On the big screen, the red ghost hovered around on a skateboard, occasionally splattering ketchup in an attempt to scare the audience with a cheap special effect. However, Yu Minglang and Xiao Qian’s faces were darker and scarier than the ghost’s. It was difficult to break the frustration every time they saw the color red!